I may lose all credibility as a human being for doing this but I really don't care.
- "Ma'am, do you have this in the next size up?" "Sorry, we only carry sizes 1, 3, and 5. You could try Sears." - C.C. Sabathia
- "I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular." - Logan Morrison
- "There's a 30% chance that it's already raining!" - Tim McCarver
- "Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die!" - Translation: Don't look at Roy Halladay for too long.
- "Oh no, I can't say anything else until I have a parent or lawyer present." - Jose Canseco
- "On Wednesdays we wear pink!" - Alex Rodriguez
- "She doesn't even go here!" - Everyone . . . to Nick Evans
- "She's fabulous, but she's evil" - about Cliff Lee
- "I have a fifth sense. It's like I have ESPN or something." - Kevin Millar
- "Nice wig. What's it made of?" "Your mom's chest hair!" - to Tony La Russa
- "That is so fetch!" - C.J. Wilson
- "Yeah! Take your top off!" - The entire world *to* C.J. Wilson
- "Oh, hi. Did you wanna buy some drugs?" - Ron Washington